It has to happen some day, I keep saying to myself.
I HAVE to let him do this.
It’s not that I don’t want him to. I am, like, begging to get to this point.
Anyway, a recent post from a fave blog made me stop and think.
(Many thanks to Momma Needs A Beer for the inspiration for this post. She’s funny, you should follow her)
It made me think of how much helicoptery I do with Mayor Bee.
Not necessarily because of him. Believe me, I would love nothing more than dropping him off somewhere for a class and be able to come back to an exhausted munchkin. He has such a high threshold; I’m normally not concerned if he takes a tumble or something like that.
My biggest worry is other kids, or rather, their parents. With friends, I either follow his cues well plus my friends are VERY understanding.
Strangers, however, are a whole nuther subject. Strangers may not (or don’t want to) understand his, uh…personality. And there is ALWAYS a chance that he may either engage in aggressive behavior with another kid OR ignore the teacher and bolt. I always have to be on guard. I agonize that I am being judged by other moms.
Both happened in his swimming camps over the summer. There are two scenarios I see in my head:
A. Man, she needs to work on controlling her son – look at him running around/not listening/screaming
2. Man, she needs to relax, let her son just go with the flow, man.
I just can’t win.
So, on Monday I went to The Little Gym to try a new class. Because, you know you have to keep trying. I was upfront with the coaches, explaining his autism and sensory quirks. It’s a small class, I was reassured and they had another instructor who could pitch in if necessary.
And I stayed outside, the entire time, with exception of taking him to the bathroom (another success story in itself but I digress). I had my camera handy to get some pictures.
We survived, with only minor issues. He had fun, he said. He definitely looked like it, trying to imitate his idol Curious George on some of the equipment. The coaches were happy with him too.
Still, I can’t get that nagging feeling out of my head. How can you balance the feeling of freedom of letting your child participate fully in an activity, without you? Do you freak out if the coach/teacher/parent may not “get” a bad response to something? Do you feel the need to press your face against the glass making sure it’ll be ok?
We’re trying another class there next week. Because if there is one think I know, it’s to be damn sure you know what you are getting into before plunking that credit card over.
With thanks to…