You Are An Obsession…

Remember that song from the 80’s?

It keeps running through my head everytime Mayor Bee goes through one of his fixation phases.

Like most kids on the spectrum, Bee has a fixation characteristic. Once he becomes fixated on something…everything else disappears. It’s “all this, all the time” and Lordy if you get in the way or suggest something different.

Recently, we went to his friend “R’s” house for a playdate. R has a REAL (though small) drum set. B fell in love with said drum set. He wouldn’t stop talking about the drum set. He wanted to go back to R’s house.

We did go back (hopefully to appease his fixation) to R’s house for a play date. However, now it’s no longer the drum set that he loves. It’s now a blue acoustic guitar that now B loves. He played with it nonstop at R’s house. He was devastated when I told him he couldn’t take it home with him, but maybe another time he can play with it.

And so now he’ll ask for that damn acoustic blue guitar. At breakfast. After nap. Before dinner. During the bedtime routine.

And it drives me absolutely bonkers. No matter how much I say, “not right now” or make excuses, the little bugger (B that is) is persistent. If anyone has any tips on managing this please share them with me. 🙂

His fixations also come in waves. For example, he suddenly became a Phineas and Ferb fan. We’ve never talked to him about it, so he must have picked it up in school. We had never watched an episode until a couple of weeks ago. Now, he asks for it specifically and even requests “certain” episodes. He’ll recite lines and even imitate Doofenshirmtz’ “Oh, come on!” line.

Thank goodness for a DVR and Video on Demand. 

I have learned to ride out his fixation phases but always have to be prepared for them to come back.

One of the many fixations: Laurie Berkner. Available anytime needed.

Case in point: a few days ago, in a pinch to divert his attention, I put in a Laurie Berkner DVD he hadn’t watched for a while. And now…he requests to watch his “Laurie Berkner” so that he can play in a band.

I guess fixation could be a good thing. For example, he has remarkable memory of songs. He’s getting better at communicating since he constantly talks about whatever he’s into – a sign of intelligence, yes? We try to work with it – whether it’s music or trains or whatever he becomes fascinated with.

I just hope I have enough storage space for his interests.


About OneLoCoMommy

I live in Northern Virginia and and I look like the stereotypical suburban mom, for better or for worse. My son plays baseball and takes karate (albeit adaptive). My daughter is a gymnastics diva but rolls with the boys in T-ball. I've been a Room Mom and Playdate Coordinator. I work full-time, try to work out, and love my Book Club. However, I also blog on my experiences on our ASD, SPD and ADHD journey while trying to be a better parent advocate. All in a life's work.
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4 Responses to You Are An Obsession…

  1. Yeah, the fixations can get intense! With my oldest we’ve gone through Star Wars, Squid, Black Holes, Rocks (repeat all of those numerous times) and now we’re onto Minecraft (a computer game) and Community (the show). He LOVES Abed, whose character has Asperger’s on the show. He didn’t even know until I recently just told him! He thought that was pretty cool. 😉 It’s interesting seeing how it evolves as he gets older. My 4 year old sounds so much like yours… it’s all about the music, baby! 🙂


  2. comeoverforcoffee says:

    I would imagine that the obsessions can get frustrating. I feel for you. We go through phases here, just not quite as intense. Phineas and Ferb is still a major deal for us. I love that show and can quote it right along with them 🙂 “They’re my brothers, and they’re robots. They’re BroBots!!” I love Candace.


    • OneLoCoMommy says:

      Phineas and Ferb isn’t all that bad, I give you that. It’s a change at least! And of course Weird Al did the theme song (B loves all the songs).

      Also, I love Spongebob Squarepants so really I can’t judge. lol


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